chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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