How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
There's a naked man in my car right now.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
