is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Mom said you looked used
my poor anus
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
