"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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