I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. you can't hotbox the world.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Randomize