So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize