Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i've created a new STD.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
