Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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