I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
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