she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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