dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize