i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
im holly from the hills drunk
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
