maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize