What did we do last night that was yellow?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
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You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
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Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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