Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I need moral support for this bender
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
