# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
