Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize