I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize
