im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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