what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
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but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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