Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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