Your mouth is God's brothel.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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