Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
