Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize