Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
