So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
he had hair everywhere except his balls
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