so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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