do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Randomize
