We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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