let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
