idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize