right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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