Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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