i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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