So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize