There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
dude. I can hear the air.
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