Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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