I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
