Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
