3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
