You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
