Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Randomize
