Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Please don't give away my fajitas
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
