He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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