i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
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