I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
