# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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