Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
So here I am, sexting at work.
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