She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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