Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
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