Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize