There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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